I have some explaining to do.

It’s happened a few times in my blogging career where I seem to just slip off into an unknown void. Without an explanation my words, pictures and food cease to exist in cyberspace. And I hate coming back here apologizing to you kind people for my absence because you are so dear and so patient – but this time I think not only will you forgive me but many of you will know exactly why I’ve taken such a long hiatus from delicious food.

I didn’t plan on saying this now but I just can’t stop thinking about you all. Your kind comments and emails keep coming in and many of you have asked if I’m okay and if I’m ever coming back. Thank you for your continued support and presence in my Internet home – even though I don’t respond to all the comments and emails I read them all and each one warms my heart and makes me long to return to this place.

Okay – I’ve procrastinated long enough. Not that I don’t want to tell you – I’m just nervous and don’t even know how to put it into to words because frankly, I still can’t believe it – here it is….

We’re having a baby!

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This will be number three and can I just tell you that I’m more nervous for this one than either of the other two little male punks that made their triumphant entry nearly 2 and 4 years ago.

We’ll have months to discuss my nerves and you can guarantee I’ll be seeking advice – especially from those of you who have three or more children.

But for now I’m just counting down the days until I’m out of the first trimester – not too much longer.

I will spare you the details of my daily afflictions but let’s just say that food and I are not friends. I eat because I have to and when I do it’s food that would have repulsed me before. Saltines, pickles and mustard – that was lunch last week. Buttered toast, Gatorade and noodles with butter and Parmesan have become regulars.

I dread when my husband makes coffee in the morning and I’ve asked him to refrain from mentioning any food items unless deemed acceptable by me. Last week in the grocery store he happened to mention white truffle oil and I nearly lost it in aisle 9. He’s still getting used to this rule as just a couple of months ago it was I that would be shunned from bringing up food – especially after we just had a rather large meal.

I can’t tell you how strange it is to go from being so incredibly in love with and passionate about food to wishing that it didn’t exist because just the thought, smell and look of it often sends me rushing to the restroom.

This has been the most intense “morning” sickness (they really should call it “all-day sickness”) I’ve experienced. I know it will blow over soon and at the end of it all – in September to be exact – I will be holding a precious baby. Having two examples of just how fast they do grow I don’t plan on this child ever being out of my arms.

So there you have it. I have no recipes to share because I haven’t been cooking – I will say though that Saltines, sharp cheddar, pickles and mustard make a tasty little cracker sandwich.

I anticipate just a couple more weeks of this sickness and really it should be letting up as each day passes – at least that’s what I’m hoping for.

I will be back, you can count on that. I have some incredible recipes to share – as soon as they sound good I’ll start making them.

Thanks again for being here, for cheering me on and appreciating great food.


106 Responses to “Why I’ve stayed away from food”

  1. Leslie

    Like everyone else here, congrats and may you speedily bounce back from the 1st trimester woes. You’ve been missed. And for what it’s worth, I’m NOT pregnant and the saltine, cheese, pickle & mustard finger sandwich is a fav or mine too! In some areas of the South, they’d call that a square meal … food pyramid and all!

  2. Teresa

    Congratulations! I was in your boat and still currently reside in it and did I mention I’m currently a culinary student as well? Let me tell you, 8 a.m. tasting olive oil and balsamic vinegars in Garde Manger was not on my list of things to do! I hope your aversion passes quickly and you and the baby can come to agree that food is good :)

  3. tracy

    congrats!!! that is so very awesome! I squealed like a little girl the second I saw that ultrasound pop up on my computer. I hope you feel better soon!

  4. Nikki

    Although the lack of good eating is indeed sad, I can’t think of a better reason for a blogging hiatus, and what a menial thing food is to momentarily give up for such a wonderful gift! Congratulations on your amazing news! All the best, hope the morning sickness passes soon!

  5. Brandi Bailey

    Wow! You have quite the following! I love it! :) And I totally predict GIRL this time! It would be just like your Mom had!!! 2 boys and then a sweet little you!! Ahh….either way, they will be adorable just like your first two! :) Love you and hope you feel better soon! I miss you! Wish you weren’t so far! :( Sad. Anyways….take care and hope to talk to you soon!! Love you lots!

  6. Madame Sucre

    Congrats on the baby!! I was wondering whats wrong with me cz I didnt bake or cook for a Month!.. happens to be: I’m also Pregnant 5 weeks.. now I know whats wrong with me LOL

    so we will be along side by side! if you need anything you can tweet me @madamesucree

    have a great day!

  7. Laura

    Let me add my congratulations to everyone else’s! Well, you may not be cooking but know that your readers will eagerly wait for news and more food once your stomach settles down. And it may not seem like it now but these days are going to zoom by!

  8. Holly

    Congratulations! I’m expecting baby number 3 and also due in early September! I have two beautiful boys 2 and almost 4! Three will be busy but SO much fun. Best of luck to you!!

  9. Joanne

    Congrats to you! I have three little ones of my own. 4.5, 2.5 and 8 months… They keep me busy indeed, but I would not have it any other way! My husband along with many others think I’m crazy for wanting a 4th, but I’d love it. I wish you all the best over the next 8 months or so and beyond! I really enjoy reading your blog and love your recipes.

  10. Mélanie

    Congratulations!! This such a wonderful new (even with the all-day sickness). I hope that you”ll soon feel better about food, but even if not, it’s all worth it!

  11. molly

    Oh my, congratulations!! We have unexpectedly, brilliantly three, and it is crazy wonderful, the best of the best. Terrifying to imagine being outnumbered, just a smidge, when you’re still trying to imagine the How?, but better than awesome in the day to day, when it’s here, and now. I’m so excited for you. Now to be done with that pesky morning sickness.

  12. Jessica

    Wow! Well congrats! As a child with 2 siblings I can tell you, 3 kids is a good number. My parents said we were a breeze. Don’t worry!

    All my hope in you feeling better soon. My husband and I are just getting into thinking about jumping into where you’re at so it’s nice to see good examples to learn from.

    PS- I love how the sonograms are marked “BABY”

  13. joey

    What wonderful news! Congratulations! Take as much time as you need and we will be waiting patiently, with bated breath, for the goodies you have lined up…including the delicious little baby in September!

    I just had my first child just two months ago so I should be going to you for advice :)

  14. Heidi

    aww man i feel yah. i am 12 weeks along, and the all day sickness is finally letting up, but still only bland foods i can tolerate…. i miss good food, but i dont want to smell it or taste it – !!
    anyway congrats from bellingham!

  15. wasabi prime

    This is incredible news! Congratulations to the whole family. I’m sorry to hear of the all-day sickness and I hope it passes soon, so you can take in the full enjoyment of things that you’re used to.

  16. Brenda

    Congrats Ashley! enjoy this pregnancy to the fullest! I so loved my pregnancy – Julian is now 8 days old. He melts our hearts. Maybe this will be a girl – will you find out or wait for the surprise?

  17. Patrice@circle-b-kitchen

    Oh, you are so right…3 kids and 30 years later, I can attest to how quickly the time passes. Must say, though, that this is the best. Those kids grown up and making their own kids. Sharing recipes, cooking for each other. You have lots to look forward to. After you’re done throwing up.

  18. jen

    I know you have no idea who I am, so feel free to chuck this advice – but I had all-day sickness as well through three pregnancies and then my naturopath told me to take 10mg. vitamin B6 and 10mg (one half tablet) of unisom, 3 times a day. This saved my life. I was actually cooking for my family, never threw up one time during my last pregnancy! It just seemed so miraculous to me that I always have to pass it on whenever I hear of someone being really sick. I remember the misery so well.

  19. Victor

    Ashley, sorry to hear how miserable you are feeling. Wishing you well and congratulations!

  20. Jena Murray

    Ashley ~ congratulations! This news is so exciting to learn. Having witnessed you go through your last pregnancy, I thought of you often over this past year as I gestated (such a funny word!) little Tristan, who is now 3 weeks old. You were one of the few mama’s I know that have boys so seeing Roman grow up as a baby two years ago has been one of my few frame of references for little boys and how quickly they grow big! Having also witnessed your calm and loving ways of being a mama to two active little ones, I know you will continue to shine as a new mother of one more. Cheers! p.s. I feel your pain on the yucky tummy… though the upchucking never fully went away during my recent pregnancy, food did become yummy again after that 4th month. Then the nesting instinct kicked in soon after and all I could think about was cooking and baking! Hang in there, kiddo!

  21. Diana @ frontyardfoodie

    Aww! Congratulations! Funny I just did this post on my own blog a couple days ago……my sickness hasn’t gone yet and I’m at 12 1/2 weeks. ha Hopefully soon!

    Munch on those crackers sister and stop making me think about food!

  22. gail marell

    i don’t know you nor your blog. i am new to food blogs, new to the food business, new to most all of it but cooking and eating.
    having babies was not my easiest accomplishment. i often joke that i don’t remember anything from the 1980’s i was pregnant the entire decade.
    that said, because i had terrible terrible pregnancies, that sound much like you have described, i couldn’t not send you this recommendation: papyrus enzymes. little chewable apricot flavored natural stomach settlers. buy them at the health food store.
    hope it gets easier.

  23. Denise @ Creative Kitchen

    Congratulations!! I can definitely relate to all day sickness. And I was also super nervous/anxious about my third child (the pregnancy & her health)…probably because I already had 2 healthy children & was afraid something would go wrong. I wasn’t very nervous with the first two, and it isn’t my personality either.

    With the all day sickness…the big bummer for me was that we had just finished redoing our kitchen!! I had been so excited all month designing it, and couldn’t wait to cook in it. Not only could I not cook in it for a VERY long time, but the smell of the glue that they used to put in the granite counter tops sent me over the edge. I couldn’t even look at my granite w/out feeling nauseous!! It was horrible. I thought I’d always feel that way when looking at in, and couldn’t imagine ever being able to cook again. Horrible times….but I pray you are out of it soon. My #3 is now a healthy, happy toddler….newly turned 2 yrs old & into everything. 😉

    Btw…I love your blog!!

  24. Betsy

    Congratulations! I’m due with my first late September, so we must be on a similar schedule, and one of my staples a couple weeks ago was whole wheat pasta with butter and Parmesan too! I keep thinking the morning sickness is gone because I’ve started meal planning again some days with enthusiasm, until after I’ve eaten the meal and can’t stand the idea of it or the smell of the dirty dishes. Just another week or two and we should be in the clear though – here’s wishing you happy food thoughts and good health! (ps – sorry I posted this in the wrong place the first time – I’m new to your blog but I love it so far!)

  25. Tammy

    Wow, congratulations!! As the mother of 7, I’ll just say this: The more, the merrier! It’s such a great adventure! When I am pregnant, I have to separate myself from anything I enjoy–or else I will connect it for years to the feeling of nausea. No fun recipes, no quilting, no photography….it really does make food a drag! I’ve loved your blog, and totally understand the hiatus! Good luck with your pregnancy and yes, hold your baby as much as you possibly can for it flies by way too fast!

  26. Kitchen Butterfly

    Just for the record, welcome to the MOT club (Mother of three, or two, or twelve…or thirteen.). As a Mom of three, I can only say….hmmmm…wondrous days ahead! Lots of love and best wishes!!!!!

  27. Mondo

    congratulations! I was wondering and now I know. take it easy; it sounds as if you’re having a hard-go of it. be well because I can’t wait to see what your going to cook up next.


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