I’m easing back in. Into this space, into the kitchen and into sharing myself through photographs, words, and food again. I’m tiptoeing up to the computer making myself tap the keys in an attempt to put words into sentences. It is a practice that I fell away from because well, I must admit that welcoming the book into the world has shaken me more than I anticipated. It’s not a bad thing, I’m just shaky. So much so that I have found myself at an entirely different seat at the table.
Instead of my usual position of shuffling in the kitchen preparing the meal, I am the one staggering to the table with empty plate in the hand in need of being fed. It’s a humbling, uncomfortable position as I much prefer the aprons strings tightly tied around my waist with a heaping platter of food made to feed those sitting around the table. But as we all know in life there are seasons; a passing of one thing to the next, and each season needs its turn. This has been my season to be fed.
Sometimes you need to be the one sitting at the table. Sometimes food is not about just about serving but also allowing someone else to serve you. There are days when you need to hold up an empty plate; tired, empty and humbly ask for a seat at the table.
Maybe you just had a baby. Or perhaps you’ve experienced great loss. Maybe it’s just that the day is hard and you need some help sludging through. Whatever the reason, at some point we all must be fed.
I’ve needed to remind myself that it’s okay to simply sit at the table without bringing anything but yourself there. That’s enough. Don’t waste a moment feeling guilt or shame because that masks the beauty of humbly taking a seat. Instead, soak it in, let each bite be one of gratitude and slowly you will be fed and eventually ready to feed again.
Those of us who hold a deep passion for food, I will venture to say that it is because we love to feed. To care for those we love and to create the space for life, relationship and love to build around the table. Let’s not forget to give those who love us the chance to do the same for us. We all need it.
The images in this post were from a lunch made by my friend, Aran Goyoaga. Ironically when I showed up for lunch she was preparing recipes from my book which is such a stunning visual of the cyclical nature of feeding others; it comes back around when you need it most.
Because of my community, my tribe and my many opportunities to sit at others’ tables in the season I am ready to feed again. I’ll be back here very soon, with cake.
Also, I have a few events to point out:
We are headed to San Francisco next week. So I’ll see you at Omnivore on Wednesday evening, right?
Then Palm Springs (2/6) and Palm Desert (2/7). More information here.