I think the best way to describe exactly what it is that I am feeling is by imagining a roller coaster. My hormones are taking me for a wild ride that is causing such inflections in emotions that my husband finds himself continually confused as to what it is that I am actually feeling or wanting.
One minute I am complaining about all my aches, pains and about that fact that I feel like a cow and how quickly people are to point out that I am truly quite large. (Yes I can still fit in a car and yes I am sure there is only one baby and no I can’t and have not tried stacking items on my belly).

I come home crying from the doctor’s office because there isn’t as much progress as I was hoping and yet when I really stop and think about the fact that in three (plus or minus) weeks there will be a newborn living in our home I panic. I have had over 9 months, 37 weeks or 260 days to have this fact feel like a reality and the faster it approaches the more nervous and frightened I get.
One moment I would give anything to have this baby outside of me and the very next I am so completely freaked out about having two children that I just hope that baby number two decides to stay in his dark, warm and cozy womb for a couple more months until I figure out logistically how to raise two children.

When both children are screaming who do I deal with first? While nursing baby number 2 (a.k.a. Roman) and number 1 (a.k.a. Baron) is being disobedient how do I discipline while continuing to feed Roman so he won’t start panicking? How do I get both children out of the car gracefully and while avoiding having Baron run into the street? Do two kids fit in one grocery cart or will I be the crazy lady trying to push two carts through the store?
That is the roller coaster of my emotions. I hope you enjoyed the ride.

While one is dealing with such emotional chaos I have found that Chocolate Cream Pie really helps ease the mind. Flaky and buttery pie crust + dark and intense chocolate pudding + unsweetened whipped cream piled high = a heavenly combination that enables the mind to become settled while the taste buds are entertained and awakened.
Now normally I do not recommend the habit of emotional eating but in such extreme circumstances such as the end of pregnancy all rules are thrown out the window and the pregnant woman is allowed whatever her heart (belly) desires.

Recipe for my favorite flaky and tender pie crust

Bake shell completely and with pie weights (if available). 350* about 20-25 minutes

Chocolate Pudding Filling

2/3 cup sugar

1/4 cup cornstarch

1/3 cup cocoa powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

4 large egg yolks

3 cups whole milk

5 oz fine-quality bittersweet chocolate (not unsweetened) chopped fine

2 tablespoons unsalted butter, softened

1 teaspoon vanilla

1 tablespoon excellent quality coffee beans

Whisk together sugar, cornstarch, salt, cocoa powder and yolks in a 3-quart heavy saucepan until combined well, then add milk in a stream, whisking. Add coffee beans to liquid to steep. Bring to a boil over moderate heat, whisking, then reduce heat and simmer, whisking, 1 minute (filling will be thick).

Whisk in chocolate, butter, and vanilla. Force filling through a fine-mesh sieve into a bowl. Cover surface of filling plastic wrap and cool completely, about 2 hours.

When both pudding and pie crust are completely cool fill pie shell with pudding. Cover pudding with a generous layer of unsweetened whipped cream. Top pie with dark chocolate shavings, mini marshmallows, chocolate cookie crumbs, m&m’s, fresh berries or anything else you desire.

Note: I really am open and looking for suggestions as to how to live out daily life while having two children. If anyone has some brilliant tips and hints please share. I would be so grateful!