Once upon a time there was a fancy egg
who was friends with that fancy egg.
They didn’t really get along with these fancy eggs but they were cordial and made pithy egg conversation while sitting next to each other in the carton.
The fancy eggs were happy with their beautiful marble coat but they still longed for more. They had heard tales of legendary eggs being baked into silky custards, or perfectly poached and served over spring asparagus.
Watching the excited child dip them into various shades of dye filled them joy (and nervousness as they feared the long and deadly fall to the ground) but that joy was short lived as they sat there, left alone to dry, dreaming of the delicious meals they could have been.
Then along comes the heroine of the story, a hungry girl who would NEVER let anything that is edible exist for the sole purpose of being a child’s craft project.
The girl was, as usual, hungry and hankering for an egg salad sandwich studded with crisp celery and fragrant green onions all bound together with pungent homemade mayonnaise.
A happy egg yolk jumped into a bowl and was joined by a splash of vinegar, a small clove of garlic – finely minced, a half a teaspoon Dijon mustard and a pinch of sea salt. Oil was then carefully added one lubricating drop at a time (1/4 cup olive oil, 1/2 cup canola oil) as hungry girl worked up a mild sweat whisking the mixture to ensure a proper emulsion.
Soon the contents of the bowl was transformed into a creamy mayonnaise.
The other fancy eggs shed their fancy coats happily knowing their life was destined for something delicious. Naked, eager and perfectly hard boiled* they hopped into an awaiting bowl joining the other ingredients.
They were blended together in the same way hungry girl’s mother used to make egg salad (with a pastry cutter) then scooped onto whole wheat bread (covered with more mayonnaise – because hungry girl is not afraid of calories). The egg salad was topped with crisp butter lettuce then accompanied with salty potato chips.**
Hungry girl was happy and full – for now.
But the fancy eggs were the happiest of all.
6 hard boiled eggs
1 celery stalk, finely diced (optional)
2 small green onions, finely chopped
3 Tbl. mayonnaise
salt and pepper to taste
Combine all ingredients until well mixed.